I Get the Message!

Isn't it funny when something speaks to you that you seem to see that same running theme everywhere? It's kind of like when you buy a new car in a color that seems unique at the time, and then every car you see on the road is that same color, the one you thought was so exclusive just a day ago. Lately it seems I am surrounded by people who are going through challenges, and it made me think of the challenges in my own life. More importantly, it made me reflect on how I handled and continue to handle them. I have never been a wallower ( I'm pretty sure that's not a word), but meaning I have never been one when faced with a particular problem, trial, challenge, whatever you want to call it that I sit and wallow and lament my situation. In fact, I think sometimes people think I'm a little callous or unfeeling because my attitude is not "Why, Why, Why?" It's "This sucks!, but how are we going to deal with it?" This is not to say that I think no one should be able to be sad or emotional when they get slammed with this wonderful thing called life. Believe me, I have done my share of crying, but it's the letting those circumstances bog you down, control you, guide your every move and thought that I'm condemning. My daughter wrote her own blog post today dealing with this same subject. My other daughter was dealing with some issues of her own surrounding, again, this same subject. Today as I read one's blog and talked with the other as she helped a friend, I couldn't help but be proud and in awe of what awesome women they have become. Neither one is a stranger to struggle or adversity. As I have shared in this blog many times before they both had a hard blow dealt them when they were very young. Struggle has been more the norm than the occasional occurrence, and yet they have persevered and become stronger for it. At the risk of crossing the line into "patting myself on the back" territory, I think a lot of how they deal with life came from the fact that I have never sugar-coated anything! I always tell the truth, even when it's not so easy to hear. I have encouraged them, and I am always in their corner, but I have never given them false hope about any situation. I have never been the mom that when my kid came home from preschool with a picture they colored entirely brown to say, "Oh, Honey, That's beautiful!" rather I would question, "Why didn't you use any other colors?"  Some would think me awful for that, but my honesty opens a dialogue about color and feelings and all sorts of things. What is fair in encouraging anyone to do something they really have no talent for? If you are not honest with your child about their abilities or lack of, in some cases, and you constantly tell them that they are good or, worse yet, the best at something, they will believe you, and someday someone will deliver the crushing blow that they really have no talent at all, and they are left questioning why you lied to them all of those years. I'm rambling, but the basic thought is this. Life is hard! People make mistakes. You can't always be the best. Sometimes things don't work out. The triumph is not in winning but surviving and becoming stronger when you lose.

And just like that, another year gone.

2012 was a wonderful year for me. For one thing, I spent a good amount of the year working as a professional actor. I had a lot of firsts this year. In August, I moved my oldest daughter into college. That was a first for me, but also a first for my family as no one in our family has ever attended college before. I survived without too many tears, and she is flourishing there, and I am so proud. Last fall I was nominated for an RTCC award for my performance in "Always, Patsy Cline", another first and such an honor. And in November I had the opportunity to film a commercial for the VA Lottery, quite an experience. I celebrated 30 years with my senior class and was glad to reconnect with so many friends, and I achieved my 50 lb. mark in weight loss. Those were the big moments and so many others to make a really blessed 2012.
2013 will bring many things for me. I will reach year 50 in October, so I am sure this will be a huge year of reflection for me. I want to continue to shed pounds and keep exercising for my health because I want to be here for another 50 to watch my girls as they continue on the amazing path they're on to the fabulous women they are becoming with each passing day. I want to continue to act as it is my greatest gift I have to share, and I feel so alive when I'm on stage. I will begin the college search with my youngest, and exciting time for both of us. My oldest will turn 21 this year, and my youngest will begin her senior year in the fall. 2013 will be filled with milestones for my little family of three. I am ready to face them all because I have their love and support through everything. I cannot imagine what my life would be without them. Bring it on 2013, we're ready for you!