It's My Daddy's Birthday

Today, my daddy would have turned 81. He has been gone almost 9 years, and at the typing of this my eyes are welling with tears. I was definitely a daddy's girl, and I think I will always miss him. Lately I have been thinkning about him a lot. He was a staunch Republican, for one. I grew up in a house that believed Nixon was railroaded. I'm serious, but I think even Daddy would scratch his head at this year's Republican nominee. Daddy might even, dare I say it, vote Democrat this year. Politics was not the only thing where my father and I differed in opinion, but I could always count on him to tell the truth, something rare these days. I especially miss being able to ask him for advice. Although he dropped out of high school, he knew something about everything. He could tell you anything about cars. He knew if he was getting a good deal, and if he was being rooked. He tinkered a lot and could fix most anything.
He would be fiercely proud of his granddaughters. He would have cried a river watching Leah graduate from college this past May, and shed just as many tears listening to Georgi's angelic voice singing some of his favorite Simon and Garfunkel songs. I love that she discovered them on her own, and loves their music just as much as my dad did.
I guess what I loved the most is that I know my daddy loved me. With all the hurt and brokenness in the world, I realize more and more each day how lucky I was. With all of our disagreements, I KNEW I could count on him for anything. He believed in me and supported me without me having to ask for a thing. He wasn't perfect. No one is, but I wouldn't have traded with anyone. I miss you, Daddy! Happy Birthday!

First, Let Me Take a Selfie

Last week at my daughter's baccalaureate service, one of the speakers addressed the issue of technology in his speech. He talked about the fact that 30 years ago when he graduated high school, there were no iPads, no iPods, no Internet, and no cellphones. He then made a joke with the last item listed that without cellphones there were no "selfies." Now, I am the first one to admit that I am definitely challenged in the selfie taking department, my girls, however are experts. But, as bad as I am at taking them, I wish I had had the technology to do so when I was in high school or all through my childhood for that matter. Why? Today is Father's Day, and I lost my dad almost 7 years ago. I wanted to post a picture on Facebook of me and my dad together, and found I really don't have that many pictures of Daddy and me together, even the old fashioned kind that had to be taken somewhere to be developed. My dad was not in front of the camera a lot. I guess a lot of that falls on the fact that he was probably the photographer most of the time when I was growing up. The few pictures that I do have of my family of 4 (Me, my sister, my mom and my dad) are when I am much older and usually taken at weddings like the one I included with this post. That makes me sad. My dad was a very handsome man, and I treasure the pictures I do have of him especially since he's gone. I am extremely grateful to have several pictures of my dad with my girls. And more so that they have the memories to go along with those pictures. Even though we lost daddy way too soon, my girls had the opportunity to really get to know and love him. When they look at pictures of themselves with their Papa, they remember, and it isn't just some picture that someone has told them, that's you and your grandpa. I think about my dad today and how much he would have loved the technology of today and really gotten into it. He would have marveled at the speed of being able to obtain knowledge in a matter of seconds at your fingertips with the touch of a button. Truth be told, he probably had the idea in his head for some of the technologies we enjoy today as he was always inventing, he just never took it to the next level. I miss him, and his crosswords, and his Reader's Digest, and his vocab quizzes and his Jumble. I miss our conversations, even our heated ones, and I really miss his laugh! Just recently I found an old cassette tape that was recorded about 40 years ago, and I can hear my dad laughing on it. That was something I'd forgotten the sound of. I was amazed just how much my laugh sounds like his. Happy Father's Day, daddy! I wish you were here to take a selfie of us laughing together.

Just a Day

Father's Day ended 15 minutes ago. This day has been just another day for me for several years now since my sweet daddy died. My children are not really involved in their father's life, so this day comes and goes without much to do, but because my sister posted a wonderful status about my dad, I have been thinking about him for the past hour. I probably didn't say it near enough when he was alive, but Thank you, Daddy! And yes, he was my "Daddy" I called him Dad occasionally, and for a while we went through a "Pop" phase, but even as an adult I called him Daddy. Through my childhood and teen years he had his issues, but I never once doubted that he loved me, and would protect me. Eventhough he was  extremely non-confrontational, let someone say something bad or attack one of his girls or his wife, and WATCH OUT!!! He was always honest with me, even when  I didn't want to hear it. I knew I got that quality from somewhere. :) But for all the things he did for me through my life, and there were many, the thing I am most thankful for is the fact that he stepped into the role of father to my two daughters when their own father left when they were 2 and 5. For that I will forever be grateful that they got to feel that special bond between a daddy and his little girl, just like I did. You left us way too soon, Daddy, and you would be so proud of the amazing people that those two little girls ( now 17 and 20
) have become. I know that somewhere you can see them, and I know you are smiling and shedding tears of joy. I love you, Daddy! Happy Father's Day!