With Each Day There Is Another Chance for Hope

Yesterday I wrote a post about the "monsters we have created." Today, as is often the case, I was lucky enough to witness something quite the opposite. This morning I got up at 7AM on a Saturday to travel up Route 64 to make it to Harrisonburg, VA, by 11AM to see a concert. Was it a rock star? No. My favorite Accapella group? No. It was a group of high school students, about 200 of them, and my daughter was among them. It was the Virginia All State Choir concert. Before my daughter left on Thursday for the 3 day rehearsal process, she gave me a copy of her schedule. It was grueling! The end product, though, was amazing! They were focused and created a beautiful, harmonious sound! They all had to go through a difficult audition to earn their place on that stage today. Before the concert began, one of the music faculty from the host high school addressed the very full auditorium. Coincidentally he had been a very active member of the youth group I co-lead about 20 years ago. He said something that lifted me out of the very despondent attitude I had yesterday. He talked about students who are in the creative arts, and how important it is that we provide support for those programs. He said that when you see the wonderful dedication that all of these students have to create something so special, it gives us all hope. And just like that, tears rolled down my cheeks, and that's exactly what I felt, hope and pride in the child I had raised and every student on that stage. Did it change anything that happened yesterday? No, but it did allow me to see that for all the bad in the world, there is also good.

The Monsters We've Created

Just when I think I can't see or hear about anything worse than the sadness that already exists in the world, today I read that a 16 year old girl was stabbed to death in the halls of her high school allegedly because she turned down a request to go to her school's prom. She was an athlete and a scholar, and she had her whole life ahead of her. She went to school this morning just like every other morning, and her life ended. What has happened? I am amazed that any child these days can even function in school having these horror stories hanging over their heads. What kind of generation are we raising that they have no regard for human life, even their own? When I was in high school, and yes, I realize that was more than 30 years ago, but the worst thing I had to worry about was taking a test I hadn't really studied for. I was never afraid at school. I knew my share of assholes and jerks and drama causers, but I was never afraid for my life. Stop and think about that for just a minute. School has become a place where our children can get killed. And I'm going to probably ruffle a few feathers here, and I am not trying to stir up a debate. This is just my observation, my opinion. Banning things is not going to help. We need to start raising our children to respect others and respect themselves. How someone could so easily take someone else's life without any regard or thought of consequences to the young girl, her family, himself or his family. I'm not saying that there is a simple solution to this out of control problem, but what I am saying is that we have to start at the beginning as parents as mentors. We need to teach at the very start that there are consequences to our actions and stop making excuses for bad behavior. If we excuse small things, that leads to letting bigger things go, and soon we have created the monsters who think nothing of stabbing a fellow student because things didn't go their way.

♪♫ If You're Ever in a Jam, Here I Am ♫♪

I am late with this post as I had wanted to post it on her actual birthday, April 17th, but Easter kind of got in the way. Last Thursday, my best friend turned 50. I turned the corner on that milestone 6 months ago, and she was right there to share it with me which is no surprise, as she has always been there for me. She is my best friend. Now, a lot of people say they have many best friends, but I can't get on board that train. If we really searched ourselves and were truthful we could all pinpoint one person that good times and bad are the one person we know we can count on. They know EVERYTHING about us, and they are still our friend. In fact they have probably been there for several of the most embarrassing moments of our lives. My best friend is no exception! I met her in my first year of middle school, 7th grade in 1976. I firmly believe that middle school is the seventh level of Hell. We are thrown together in a totally new environment where we have to change classes and remember locker combinations and the evil of all evils (cue ominous music) change for gym class. Stir into that pot a big helping of hormones, and you have the recipe for chaos and disaster. Because of this lethal combination, I think this is when we form our strongest bonds with friends as we are clinging to each other for survival as we navigate the dangerous waters far from the protective Armada we called elementary school. My middle school was a campus style school, so as we arrived each morning we would have to wait outside leaning against the wall of our homeroom. This is where I first met Lisa. I can still see her, long blond hair, glasses. I don't even remember how or what caused us to meet, but we became fast friends and spent most of 7th grade inseparable. We even had a crush on the same guy. Remember that thing about embarrassing moments? She and I shared a major one in Middle School. We had both been cast in the Drama Club's production of "Little Women," she as Meg and me as Jo. When opening night came we had never been through the whole show, not even once. I'm not even sure we had read the script all the way through. To this day I don't know how we got through it. I think we actually just made up the ending on the spot. We laugh about it now, but back then we were terrified. On to high school and we had Honors Biology together. I have no idea what I was thinking signing up for that torture. We sat at lab tables, and when we would have tests, the class was asked to move to the ends of the table so we couldn't cheat. Many times Lisa and I would read the first question silently and simultaneously look up at each other with that all too familiar look of horror indicating that neither one of us had the slightest idea how to answer the question. I barely squeaked by in that class. We did shows together,  created a French meal together and had sleepovers, and she even went on vacation with me. We spent countless days at Kings Dominion and acted out their show "Hooray for Hollywood" in her living room. Did I mention embarrassing? Over the last 38 years we have had our ups and downs. We even went through our first pregnancies together as her children are only 3 weeks younger than mine. At the darkest time in my life when I suspected that my marriage was about to fall apart, I called her, and after working a weekend shift at her job, she came over to sit with me and try to distract me from the hell my mind was going through. When my marriage was finally over, and I had nothing, she and her husband showed up with huge amounts of food to help us through. When my dad died and then shortly after that, my grandmother, she was right there with food and helping hands at the house as my sister and I were busy with other arrangements. We can go months without seeing each other and get together and pick up conversation like we talked on the phone the day before. I know she will always be there for me, and I for her. She's beautiful and smart and fun, and I love her, and I am sure we will be friends until we're so old we can't remember each other's names, and I am so glad! So..Happy Birthday, BEST FRIEND! Here's to 50 more!

Forgive and Forget?

So, it's been quite a while since I penned anything for this blog, but I read something today that has got me a little riled. A local pastor was indicted by a Texas Grand Jury last September on two counts of aggravated sexual assault on a child younger than 14 and  two counts of indecency with a child.  If you read the article it goes into detail of the nature of the charges. Personally, they make my skin crawl! But that isn't what made me want to write today. A local church (not the church where he was pastor, he resigned from there) has a flyer advertising their Good Friday service. At the bottom of the flyer it lists, along with photo, several pastors who will be speaking, and smack dab in the middle is the grinning face of  Pastor Pedophilia. Why, you may ask? That is my question! Not just why is he preaching? Why is he out on bond? He was arrested last May. And why is he allowed to be here in Virginia when he is awaiting trial in Texas for his disgusting behavior? And, ultimately, who in their right mind would ask him to preach in front of a congregation? If I were a betting woman, I would say, given that it's Good Friday, there will be some grandiose confession and a message about how Jesus dies for ALL. For all you Christians ready to pounce on me right about now, let me say this. Yes, I believe, as a Christian, that Jesus did die for all. We are all redeemed by the blood of the lamb and forgiveness is there for anyone, and I do mean anyone, that truly repents. However, that does not mean that we should be placing these people in front of the masses to "share the good news." I am not exactly sure why he is still free, but if convicted he will be behind bars for the rest of his life. So, while we've got him, let's let him lead a flock....NO!!! The article further states that after his resignation, the board discovered that he had "multiple extramarital affairs" with church members and people in the community. Wow! What an upstanding guy! I am sick and tired of people hiding behind the robes of Jesus to excuse their abhorrent behavior. And people wonder why the church gets a bad rap. Should we forgive? That's what the Bible says, but I haven't seen any repenting.