Obligatory New Year Title

This post will be dated January 2, 2016, but I am actually writing it before I go to sleep on New Year's Day. Somehow that seems to be indicative of my life in 2015, not quite able to do things exactly when they needed to be done. What I seemed to learn from that this year is that things don't always work out, and adjustment is the name of the game. There were several firsts for me in 2015. I began the year in rehearsals for a college production of "Funny Girl," playing Mrs. Brice. I never went to college, so this was a new experience for me. I must say it would have been much easier if I had been college age. To put it mildly, they work you to death, lots of long rehearsal hours. I was hired as a costumer for the first time for a community theater production of one of my favorite Neil Simon comedies, "Come Blow Your Horn." I really enjoyed doing it. I must not have done too bad a job because I was asked to costume the show that followed. The adjustment here was that I was also performing in a show that was opening the same weekend as the one I was costuming. Note to self: Never do that again! Luckily, my youngest was helping me, and took over when I couldn't be there anymore. The biggest "first" for me in 2015 was brain surgery, not a metaphor, actual brain surgery. If you read this blog you know that I had a pituitary tumor removed the end of October. Talk about adjustment! The neurosurgeon said that the tumor had probably been growing for 10 years. Of course you want something like that out of your body, but there are all kinds of things that happen once it's out that you don't think about. More adjustments, adjustments mostly to hormonal changes. I never really bothered to think about what the tumor was doing to my pituitary gland as the vision changes because of the pressure on my optic nerve are what led to the discovery, but the pituitary gland controls all the hormones and body temperature and all kinds of other things. For instance I still don't have my full sense of smell back, and randomly I will start smelling fresh paint. I have hot flashes, and other menopausal type things. Been there, done that, got the T-shirt. All in all I'm certainly thankful to have the tumor gone, but I wonder how long I will need to adjust. I ended the year and will begin 2016 with another first. I auditioned actors for my first foray into directing professionally. I am excited about this one, but also anxious as I adjust to sitting behind the table and not being on stage.
2016 will hold the biggest first for not only me, but my whole family. My oldest will graduate college in May. She will be the first ever to do so in our family. I am so proud of all she is doing and will do. Because I work for the University she attends, I will actually get to hand her her diploma. There will be much adjustment made that day as I try to keep it together in the awesome emotion of that moment. I am sure there will be many more issues that arise from the aftermath of brain surgery in 2016, but I have a ton of supportive fiends and an amazing family to help me through. I know I can face it well adjusted! Happy New Year!

2014..a look back.

So...it's over. The last post I wrote was about enjoying Christmas and not rushing here and there trying to cram everything holiday into the small window of time that I didn't stop to enjoy it. I am happy to say that I came pretty close to succeeding. Whether it was the fact that I didn't have time to rush around because I was working 1 full time job and 2 part time jobs or I took my own advice I'm not sure, but it was a much more laid back Christmas than I have had in years. It gave me some time to reflect on everything that has changed, some for the worse, but most for the better, in 2014. One of the most significant things that happened in 2014 was a double-edged sword for me. My baby graduated High School with honors last June. I was so proud of her, but I was also very sad. This was the end of school days for me. She has always been independent, but this marks society's definition of "no longer a child," and my role as a mother changes. This also marked the law's definition of adulthood, and child support ended in the middle of June, a day after she graduated. Because of this reduction in family income, I began to search for a part-time job, and in August I was hired to work with a local preschool with 2 and 3 year olds. I was excited but also extremely nervous. I am 51, and I haven't dealt with little ones in a LOONNGGG time! Would I be able to handle this? Would they like me? Would I be able to handle it physically? It was one of the sweetest experiences of my year. Physically, it was demanding, but 40 new little people made their way into my heart, and I will remember them for a very long time.
After working 9 years at my present job, I finally received a promotion. This, too, was a double edged sword as I was required to give up my job at the preschool. I will definitely miss the money, but it was heartbreaking to leave all those little faces. My new job is a challenge for many reasons, and I know it will take some time to settle in, but in the long run, I think it will be for the best.
In March of 2014, something very exciting happened! My oldest daughter was accepted as a transfer to a prestigious University, and would be moving back home. My little family of 3 would be under one roof again, and at the end of her very difficult first semester, she ended 2014 with all A's and B's. My youngest began college last fall and closed out the year with a 3.6 GPA. They both will do great things! They are the first 2 to go to college in our family, and I am in awe of them!
Physically, I made a big change in 2014. I decided to stop coloring my hair. I started getting gray hair in high school, just a stray here and there, but by the age of 22, the strays had grown enough for me to start coloring my hair. I have been coloring my hair dark brown for almost 30 years, but when my income reduced, I looked for any way to save money, and coloring my hair was something easy, so I stopped. The overall consensus is people love it. In fact some people think I have bleached my hair. It took me longer to get used to it, but I actually love it, and am very glad I took the plunge.

I have no idea what 2015 will hold for me. I'm a little anxious about things like finances and how the economy will affect me, but isn't everyone? I'm not really a resolution maker, but I do want to tackle 2015 with less stress, and live one day at a time. My mantra this year will be the prayer of serenity. I wish you the same!

2013...An Amazing Year!

We've been in 2014 for about 2 1/2 hours, so I decided to sit down and write about my 2013 and maybe put a little bit out there about some things I might expect in 2014. I started 2013 doing something I love and I ended it the same way. I had the incredible fortune to get a call last January from a wonderful director that I had never had the opportunity to work with, Steve Perigard. He was directing Noel Coward's Hayfever for Va-Rep, and the actress playing the maid, Clara, had to drop out of the show. He was asking me if I'd like to do it. Well, of course I said yes, and thus began my year acting. It was a wonderful experience, and more importantly I made some amazing new friends. In the spring I took over the role of audience member and saw my baby tear up the role of Anita in her high school's production of West Side Story. Saying I was a proud mother would be an understatement. In the beginning of May I celebrated two things, my oldest having an incredible freshman year in college and the fact that I survived a year of not having her at home. In the summer I took a little break from the stage to watch both of my girls in productions of their own. In July I found out that I had been cast in one of my all time favorites, To Kill a Mockingbird, again with Va-Rep. We had a long rehearsal process and opened in September. It was a fabulous experience, and I got to meet Mary Badham, the Oscar nominated actress who played Scout in the film, a real treat for this film geek! When Mockingbird closed I went right into rehearsal, again for Va-Rep, for A Lugnuts Christmas, an original musical. That's how I closed out my year, and I will also start 2014 acting thanks to Va-Rep as Lugnuts runs for one more week. I have worked more as an actress this year than I have in my 40 year career, and I hope it will continue in 2014!
There were also some incredible losses in 2013. The person I called my father-in-law for 15 years lost his battle with several health issues, and left this world on his own terms. Shortly after his 50th birthday, my cousin left us quite unexpectedly, the victim of a pulmonary embolism. It really made me view my own mortality as he was one of the healthiest people I knew.
What will 2014 hold? For one I will watch my baby turn 18 in exactly one month from today. She will also graduate from high school, and I will officially become an empty nester, a little scary for me. This particular year will hold some rough challenges for me, but I have faith that God has always had a plan for me, and I will get through. "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer. 29:11 

And just like that, another year gone.

2012 was a wonderful year for me. For one thing, I spent a good amount of the year working as a professional actor. I had a lot of firsts this year. In August, I moved my oldest daughter into college. That was a first for me, but also a first for my family as no one in our family has ever attended college before. I survived without too many tears, and she is flourishing there, and I am so proud. Last fall I was nominated for an RTCC award for my performance in "Always, Patsy Cline", another first and such an honor. And in November I had the opportunity to film a commercial for the VA Lottery, quite an experience. I celebrated 30 years with my senior class and was glad to reconnect with so many friends, and I achieved my 50 lb. mark in weight loss. Those were the big moments and so many others to make a really blessed 2012.
2013 will bring many things for me. I will reach year 50 in October, so I am sure this will be a huge year of reflection for me. I want to continue to shed pounds and keep exercising for my health because I want to be here for another 50 to watch my girls as they continue on the amazing path they're on to the fabulous women they are becoming with each passing day. I want to continue to act as it is my greatest gift I have to share, and I feel so alive when I'm on stage. I will begin the college search with my youngest, and exciting time for both of us. My oldest will turn 21 this year, and my youngest will begin her senior year in the fall. 2013 will be filled with milestones for my little family of three. I am ready to face them all because I have their love and support through everything. I cannot imagine what my life would be without them. Bring it on 2013, we're ready for you!

1-1-11

The ball has dropped, and I am sitting in front of the computer, once again, in the wee hours of the morning. About 90 minutes ago we began 2011. A new year. It makes us think, think about where we've been, where we're going, goals, plans, dreams that have come true, and dreams that have disappeared. On my cell phone greeting for the past 365 days it has said, "2010, MY YEAR!" I started thinking the other day as we were approaching the end of 2010, has it been MY YEAR? Well that really depends on how I am going to measure success. Monetarily? NO, 2010 was definitely NOT my year. Career? NO, can't really say that either. However, 2010 did bring me other types of success. One, I started this blog. I was never a diary keeper or a journaler, and truthfully, never considered myself a writer. Some of you readers may not consider me a writer even now, but having this outlet has been very therapeutic at times for me, and I think it's really helped me to grow. Two, I had the chance to create a role in a workshop production of a show called "Company of Angels" with some very dear friends, and my daughters. Three, I embarked on a personal fundraiser by selling my carrot cakes and started a small side business at the holidays called 24 Carrot Cakes that I thought was pretty successful. I saw both of my daughters make All District Chorus, my youngest sing her first solo in church and my oldest receive confirmations for her college auditions. So, I guess you could say 2010 was a year of personal firsts and accomplishments and definite realization that my little girls are growing up, but oh, what wonderful young women they are becoming. THAT is my true success. What will 2011 bring? Who knows, but I am ready for the journey.